Today I want to talk about feedback that you may receive from others, both directly and indirectly, which can be quite negative and how you deal with it.
I’ve had some experiences over the last year or so where I’ve done something in either my personal or work life where people haven’t had a particularly positive opinion of what I’ve been doing. It’s been quite negative.
They might not agree with what I’m doing and/or how I’m doing it- they’re asking why I’m doing it or why I’m doing it in that way.
Whilst I feel that we do need to take feedback, criticism and comments like this onboard (they certainly shouldn’t just be dismissed), we do need to dissect them a little bit before we allow them to knock us off course or affect our confidence.
Take Stock of Who's Giving You Their Opinion
Negative feedback can have a huge impact- one much more far-reaching than any amount of positive feedback funnily enough. So how do we then move forward from that? We need to consider the source…
If the person criticising you is someone whose opinion you value then their comments can be quite detrimental. It makes you question why you’re doing what you’re doing, how you’re doing it and really, if you’re doing it for the right reasons.
Consider the following- is that person right, or is it just that they’re not aligned with what you’re actually trying to achieve? Are they understanding your bigger picture? Does their opinion hold any real weight with you?
Sometimes in life there are people who we’re not necessarily going to agree with. They’re never going to give us positive feedback and they don’t agree with what we’re doing as we simply differ too much across the board.
Learning Which Comments to Take Onboard
As important as it is to be open to constructive criticism from reliable sources, I think it’s also important to consider that when you’re putting yourself out there and doing something that’s a bit different, you’re going to get some negative feedback- you can’t please everybody.
People aren’t always going to like you and support you in what you’re doing. But if you’re sure that your vision is the right vision for you, then you need to pursue it regardless.
As long as you’re not doing something that is clearly wrong or damaging to anybody, then you need to push forward.
Listen to the people that you admire, the people you care about and the people who have maybe inspired you previously- if they’re not on board with what you’re doing then take a breath and listen but don’t let random naysayers knock you of course.
Thoughts On A Postcard Please
I’m really interested to understand how you deal with negative feedback; what strategies you use to ensure it doesn’t impact the rest of your day, the rest of your week and that voice that’s in the back of your head (everyone has one of those…right?).